Welcome to The Lost Chronicles, a series of posts I forgot to update previously thought to be lost forever. Here we explore my previous journeys through the land of the rising sun. The first entry was written after my graduation from JCMU, but was never posted because of no Wi-Fi ninjas. Hajimemashou.
For my final weekend (during school), I’ll apologize to those who weren’t born in the 90’s, or somehow didn’t have Graduation by Vitamin C beaten into their skulls enough to recognize the title reference. Yes, after about 9 weeks of “intensive language” (that was the subject), we’re finally done. While there are some people in my class that I will almost miss (I don’t usually “miss” people (except you who are currently reading this, I of course missed you (I wrote special code that only showed this sentence for you, nobody else, don’t ask how)) unless I’m gone for a really long time, and this was like summer camp, so there wasn’t really any “Let’s be FRIENDS FOREVER!” feelings. If you feel that way and are reading this, it’s probably just gas, give it a month or so.
Friday
Today was our last day of classes, so of course the teachers took it easy reviewed the last week and some new stuff in the 3 hours we had. I documented part of that day in a video brilliantly titled “A Day in Curtis’ Life”. Most of you saw it long ago. In case you missed it.When I showed some people a preview, and here’s what the critics had to say:
“I honestly hate you so much.” -Monica Cassetta
“Why are you so stupid?” -Maki Nakayama
“This is one of the dumbest and best things I’ve ever done.” -Curtis P. Bartholomew Yaggi VI (Yes, that’s what the “E” is short for, and yes, one of my middle names is just P).
“This movie made my heart glad. It is filled with innocence, hope, and good cheer. It is also wickedly funny and exciting as hell.” -Roger Ebert
Wise words by all. I shall point out that the first two still laughed, so it’s not that bad. It’s what you’d expect from me, yet still full of surprises.
Saturday
We had an exam (yeah, on a Saturday! It was terrible, I missed my cartoons (just kidding, cartoons are Sundays here)). I started it out with my last S’mores Pop-Tart, and celebrated the end with my last Swiss Cake Roll. I probably did something else, but I forgot.
Sunday
Today was our graduation. We still had to get up early like we had class, but luckily there was no learning, so my brain was able to keep sleeping for a little bit. We went to the main conference room where all the teachers, some staff, and some host families had gathered. When they called your name, you stood up and said “hai”, then walked up and received a sweet certificate with fancy writing. Then someone from each class (four students, then a group of three from the hippy environmental science group) gave a presentation. They were all in Japanese, which made it easier to tune out (well, I listened to the interesting ones). After, we all went downstairs and had drinks and donuts and stuff. We gave a card to each of the teachers with pictures of the class we had secretly taken after class (secret to the teachers. The students were aware of the picture being taken. Maybe one or two weren’t, but they’re kind of…off). Then everyone took pictures with everyone else and one of the girl’s host dad surprised us (including her) with a song on his guitar while she sang. It was a lot of fun. Soon after, I was rushed to a barbecue that was being thrown by a guy who owns two bars near JCMU (some of my friends had been there before, and he LOVES America, so invited whoever wanted to come). At first it was a little awkward because most people spoke only Japanese. We talked to a few people, some in English, some in Japanese. However, in my mind, even just a few minutes talking to someone, I remember the conversation in English regardless of if it was or not. It wasn’t until I remembered the guy I was talking to spoke zero English did I realize I had remembered the translation. It was pretty interesting. They kept grilling up really good food. Some potatoes, hot dogs, corn, and pretty much every kind of meat. It was here that I did something I don’t think I’ve ever done in my life. If you’re a member of my family or a close friend, make sure you’re sitting (again, if you’re reading this, you probably are, but just in case). I ate food (meat) that I didn’t even know what it was! I know, exciting stuff. It’s actually my second rule to live by that “if you’re not sure, don’t eat it” (the first is “don’t argue with stupid people). The problem is I can’t eat it again because I don’t know what it was. Part of it was because the meat seemed to follow my normal rules of what I can eat (don’t ask what they are, I don’t have time), but also because one of the girls just kept feeding us (literally), so it was hard to say no (until I got full). We played the exciting American game of flip cup (which is dumb, I prefer beer pong. I also prefer not drinking beer, it’s gross), and then some of the girls took turns being carried against their wills and thrown into the nearby lake by the guys (who were all jacked (that means ripped (that means they had a lot of muscles)) and tan). The first girl kept shouting レープ！レープ！(If you can’t read that, and can’t use contextual clues, don’t worry about it). After a while, we were tired and ready to go home. However, we were driven by our fun American-loving friend, and since he was kind of in charge, couldn’t leave for a while. Around 4 or 5, it suddenly became cloudy and we could tell it was about to storm. So we all packed up everything and put it into the vans. He took us back to his bar (we still more wanted to go home) and we helped but everything back in. Eventually we returned home, and everyone got ready to leave the next day.
Monday
I got up early to say goodbye to some people. Choose (hover over) a reference!: Just like [DBZ] [Toy Story] I sadly watched as I lost all of my friends one by one (I was staying to help with a special event (more on that later)). Actually, one of my friends stayed, so it was ok. That night, the teachers all went to a farewell party for one of the staff, and the two other students who were staying were out somewhere. I walked outside looking for one of them, and realized that nobody was there. I’m at least 95% sure that at the time, I was the only one on the whole campus. After walking the halls naked (just kidding, there were still people at the restaurant next door, so I wore a fundoshi), I went back to my room and started cleaning and packing.
Next time I cover my day at the Maibara Cultural Festival teaching kids English and American origami. What is American origami? Do I really own a fundoshi? Will little brainy Bobby be a stock broker man? Will Heather ever find a job that won’t interfere with a tan? Find out next time on TGC: The Lost Chronicles. Dah dahh dadahhh da dahh duuhhh (for my newer readers, that’s the theme song, and no, I don’t know what it actually sounds like)!